The Youth & Family Institute

POSITIVE PARENTING
By Dr. Dick Hardel
Metro Lutheran
Michael Sherer, Editor

How’s The Family’s Laugh-Life?

Laughter brings delight to all the people who are connected to that ho-ho-holy moment. Laughter seems to provide healing moments and brings out the best in families and friends. Laughter is the original digital camera, instantly framing a picture of a beautiful relationship. Humor and human come from the same root word. What is humorous is what is of the earth. Aren’t we all according to Genesis 1 & 2?

Deep within each of us appears to be desire to help other people celebrate the joy of relationships. When family members and friends hold an infant, there is an internal urge to help the infant to smile and laugh. And when the child smiles and laughs, the person holding the child smiles and laughs. In turn all those surrounding the child smile and laugh. Laughter provides infectious healing.

In the book The Cross in the Sawdust Circle (available from The Youth & Family Institute) I have devoted an entire chapter to note how laughter is a gift of God. God has given the gift of laughter so that people can celebrate the intimacy of holy family and holy friend relationships. Laughter truly is the shortest distance between people. When we think of the times we laughed so hard that tears ran down our faces or we may have fallen out of our chairs, we are immediately connected to the person or persons who were with us at the ho-ho-holy moment. Laughter is God’s gift so that we can continue to celebrate those relationships, even after one of the persons may have died.

I don’t even have to close my eyes to connect to those ho-ho-holy relationships. I can still see the bowl of oatmeal on my daughter’s head when she was about two years old. The oatmeal ran down her head over her shoulders and down her arms. When she shook her hands, there was oatmeal all over the kitchen. O how Carolyn and I laughed. The laughter was a photo of the gift of God Angie is in our lives.

I can see my son, Kent, when he was about 6 years old with one eye open as our family prayed before meals at the table. The fact that I know he only had one eye open indicates that I had at least one eye open. When each of us connected with our one eye open during the prayer, we burst forth with loud laughter. We often use the phrase, “You had to be there,” to explain the ho-ho-holy moment. That is because it is about a holy relationship.

My eyes still fill with tears of delight when I think of our family gathered together and listening to my nephew, Joseph Wangerin, simply telling stories

when he was younger and worked in the library in Evansville, IL. The laughter is not because of funny stories, but it is about our holy relationships and the love we share. God gives those relationships and God gives laughter as a way to remember and be remembered in those holy relationships.

Laughter frees families from tension and reminds us that it is all right to be human and that God loves humans. It gains attention and it aids in retention. Thus an important question for healthy families is, “How is your laugh-life?”

FAMILY ACTIVITIES

If there is a zoo nearby, visit the zoo. Look for animals and actions that cause you to laugh. Talk about why the animal(s) or action brings laughter. This would be a great setting to recite the 1st article of the Apostle’s Creed and Luther’s explanation.
Take a look at old family photos, movies, or videos to see times when your family was caught on cameral laughing together. Talk about those ho-ho-holy moments.
For a family night, each family member shares his/her favorite story of when someone provided a ho-ho-holy moment for the family.
If circus is in town, take the entire family, and laugh with the children of all ages.
Tells stories of times you laughed during a worship service of the congregation or during devotion at home.